blue heron

for the first time, i am sleeping alone in the middle of the city (under a plot of trees on a soft dry bed of pine needles), in a mummy-style sleeping bag that's camouflage in the shade of the towering firs above me--and i feel free. . . .i can sleep in, without having to worry about anyone checking on me, and i know i have everything provided for me. in my cocoon under the trees, with cars zipping by in their busy trapped lives, i feel like a little animal looking up out of my hole when i awaken.

today, i awoke to a gray sky, and after meditating on my breath for awhile, i put on my pants and shoes, tied up my sleeping bag, and as i was about to climb over the wall that separates my little forest home from civilization, i found a polished black stone on the bed of dead tree needles. so i pocketed it, seeing it as a gift from the universe whose purpose will most likely become apparent in time.

a little later, i went to powell's to continue reading The Alchemist. in the passage i read today, the old king figure tells the boy hero, the shepherd Santiago to follow the omens that the universe leaves, which will lead him to his destiny, and gives him two stones: one black, which means, "yes," and the other white, which means, "no," and the man instructs the boy to ask objective questions along his path, and the stones will help him read omens that are laid out. just then a butterfly appears, and the boy takes it to be a good omen, and the man nods, sensing the boy's thought.

my adventure is taking a different turn. did i mention i was ordered to stay off psu's campus? remember that day when i was telling you about my bat totem, and we discovered a new path together, at the end of which was the vista bridge on which my story started? then, the next day, on my way to ben's, i decided to follow some runners, instead of taking the usual path, and i discovered an easier path, and some different insights. i started realizing that the universe is guiding me out of a rut, into new exciting territory. so when events led up to receiving a citation banishing me from psu which has been my territory for 2 years, it was kind of a shock, but also not quite a surprise. i am literally being forced to change paths.

i, too, am being called to the SE. the other day, in fact, i stayed with my friend brandon who lives off belmont. while he showered, i walked to get a bite to eat, leisurely meandering, feeling connected, looking for signs. a small asian man dressed in an orange robe struck my attention. he was holding orange leaves behind him, and stepping carefully, mindfully, emanating peace. so i decided, on a whim (whimsical as i am) to follow him (i thought he might be a monk). then a free box called to my attention, to my right. an empty beer box was there, BLUE HERON brand, so as I squatted down and ripped off the cardboard emblem, the monk ahead of me turned around and stopped, smiling, curious. he seemed to be watching a black dog across the street, and i asked him if this was his dog. he muttered something (it seems he didn't speak English), which i thought was, "yes." i showed him what i had found, and said the blue heron is a symbol. it means, "clues dropped from the universe" (my shaman guide teddy just a couple days before had drawn the blue heron card for me in his animal spirit deck). the monk repeated, smiling as if amused, "clues," and continued on his path. when i got up and continued in his direction, the monk was gone, and looking for him, i realized i was standing by the Dharma Center, complete with a zendo and free zen meditations (which i had been wanting to find). later on, when i got to new seasons to eat, i overheard an old man, distinguished in appearance, and an older woman excitedly talking about the universe's mysteries revealed. they were seated under a piece of art that was like something i had made before when i was connected. it simply said, "HEAVEN," in blue crudely painted letters on a white background. i had been wondering earlier in the day if i should try making some money at making art, and this was reassuring. well, after observing the couple talking, and thinking, after seeing all the clues, i should take the initiative and go up to them, i did. the man was a little rude, since i had intruded on their conversation, and i apologized, and said they were a manifestation in my reality, and he said, "here, this is for you," and handed me a small booklet. i asked him if his contact info. is in here, and he said, "yes." the booklet talks about how synchronicities in this new reality are the norm, and contains a 13 moon calendar, based on the mayan tzolkin. the booklet is put out by an organization i had never heard of before, based in ashland, oregon, called "the foundation of the law of time."

i just keep on going, having faith. it is hard, and there are many unknowns, and i am faced with the weakness of my mortality and meager existence every day, but, fearless, i am following my destiny.